Saturday, March 8, 2008

ambivalence

1) everyone who plays poker with me knows that i fish...and about 70% of the time, i win...but since i'm trying to play a bit more conservatively, i tend to fold on cards that i would normally go "all in". it backfires for some reason when we play with the guys but is usually a good strategy when i'm on celebrity poker on bravo's website. thanks to cindy and james for introducing me to the website!
2) the bourne supremacy was on tv tonight. the funny thing about this trilogy is that i watched all three movies with three different guys. however, the movie that i remember most vividly and thoroughly is the bourne ultimatum with ry. the past five years for some reason, i fall asleep during movies (rented or in the theater). action-packed...i comprehend the meaning of this word. i loved that movie.
3) what influenced me to create this blog was the book the secret written by rhonda byrne. while reading the secret, i realized by nature, i adopt a lot of the philosophies. i tend to have an aversive reaction to negativity. i'd rather not be surrounded with that energy, but ironically have a lot of detrimental feelings about myself. i am working on it though. noralie loaned me her copy, and it's very uplifting to hear so much optimism and enthusiasm in her voice. the law of attraction - sounds like endless powers.
4) after watching a bachelor edition of everyday italian, ry and i were inspired to try out giada's rendition of mac n' cheese. ry was my sous chef and grated a good 2 1/4 cups of asiago cheese for me. we added some ham and broccoli to our dish. i don't think i'll use as much cheese next time, and make sure to thoroughly mix all the ingredients so that the cheese sauce is creamier. otherwise, it was quite tasty!
5) innocence...something so precious but can easily be destroyed. i was profoundly moved by this word a few times this week. james was talking to me about a baptism seminar that he attended and the thought process of cleansing infants from their sins. you look at peyton's face, stare into zoe's eyes, or for any child for that matter...how can there be any sin? during j's last team meeting, we talked about how his peers are getting older and misguiding j, taking advantage of his innocence. it angers me.
6) ry made me a margarita tonight. prior to his, dad's was my best homemade margarita but it might be a close race. perhaps a pitcher of each and i'll be able to draw a conclusion.... :)
7) when his mom told me that j started therapeutic horseback riding, i thought it would mainly strengthen his core muscles and improve his body awareness. however, the additional benefits of THR include exposure to sensory integration, improvements in auditory processing and cognition and concentration of communication and social skills. amazing.
8) i have never heard of a red panda. physical appearance alone, it looks more like a raccoon to me but similar to the panda bear, red pandas feed off bamboo. their population continues to decline due to a process of environmental change called habitat fragmentation. they sleep during the hot noontime in the shady crowns of treetops.
9) i've spent 8 consecutive hours tossing grenades, whacking an opponent in the back of the head with my pistol, sniping in the corner and running people over in a tank. i miss those halo days! i remember ron and i spent 8 and a half hours driving down from the bay area, stopped off at james and penny's and played a 3 hour game! or watching the sun rise as cindy and i drive back to mom's after a night of halo at james' place. we definitely have to bring that back!
10) making decisions have always been tough for me. i'm definitely wishy-washy and waver when making choices. but the great thing is that the reason i have that difficulty is that i have been blessed with options.